In Time
by galacticbestbuds
Summary: Staring into his eyes where the fire doesn't quite reach anymore, she wonders if it's selfish that a part of her wants to tell him that she loves him. (She doesn't.) — maya-centric, one sided narumayo, post t&t to dd.


_**IN TIME**_

 _ **summary:**_ staring into his eyes where the fire doesn't quite reach anymore, she wonders if it's selfish that a part of her wants to tell him that she loves him. (she doesn't.) — _maya-centric, one sided narumayo, post t &t to dd._

—

She's nineteen and exhausted.

Something that she's heard time and time again during her training is that she is a leader – Maya is in line to become the Master of the Kurain Channeling Technique, after all. She is to be a role model for her students, to never make a mistake as grave as her mom did. She must take extra lessons and go through even more rigorous training than she's ever experienced before to live up to a title she never really wanted in the first place.

(There's no escaping to the city now, though.)

Maya learns to make decisions for others, for the name of the Fey clan, for her people. At this point, she doesn't have time to make decisions for herself.

During times like these, when the bruises on her back from the constant training under waterfalls begin to sting, and her eyes dry up after hours of studying old scrolls, she remembers the reason she pursued becoming Master in the first place.

 _It was the night before she returned to Kurain. They had sent Pearl to bed early, and they'd just finished watching a movie – the one that Mia loved and hung a poster of in their very office. ("Still, I can't believe you were able to figure out the name of the movie. I've been trying to remember for years." "Guess I got my sense of investigation from you, huh?")_

 _The screen has since gone blank, yet the two remained on the couch. Maya's head was rested on Phoenix's lap, and she wondered how long she could lay there and pretend tomorrow wasn't happening._

" _It's just scary, you know, Nick?" She'd been rambling on for a while and the shakiness in her voice was starting to make her cringe. "Just knowing that this was the reason my mom was killed. I—I don't want any more bloodshed. I don't want to spend every day fearing if someone's after the title, or if I'm next, or—"_

" _But who says it has to stay that way?" Phoenix said, and when he started absentmindedly playing with her hair, free of all her hairpins and accessories, Maya had to suppress the shiver that his touch brought. "I know you, Maya. If anyone's going to change Kurain, it's you. And I'll be right by your side through it all."_

 _And Phoenix smiled, and Maya smiled, and at that moment, she thought to herself, "Hey, things are going to be alright."_

A blue-clad hero. Her best friend. And maybe it was in the way that he always told her that he believed in her. Maybe it was in the way that he cared for her so much that he was willing to risk everything. Maybe it was how he felt like home in ways that Kurain could never be after Mia had left. Somewhere along the line, that initial hero-worship she had for him developed into something more real. More grown up.

If she ever wants to balance being Master and continue as Phoenix's legal assistant at the law firm someday, she'll have to work as hard as she possibly can.

So, even when everything feels unbearable, she smiles and powers through it all.

At the end of the day, a lot of what she does is for him.

—

The very few times she can talk to her sister is after hours of training when she is lying in a bed that is too large for her. Maybe it's the room that's too large, or maybe it's because it's her mom's old room when she was Master – when she was _alive_ – and the shoes she has to fit in are much bigger than she can ever fill.

Mia's the only one that she can talk to, _really_ talk to, nowadays. As much as she loves Pearl, she'd never want to put more on her small shoulders than her Aunt already has.

Maya talks about her training, the Elders, and most importantly, her feelings.

The words fall out of her mouth before she can even process them. That's the kind of relationship she's had with Mia. Maya knows that she'll never be judged by her, and Mia was always the best at listening.

"I want to turn the tides here in Kurain, maybe even restructure the hierarchy, the council… everything. There's no doubt about that. And I want to prove myself to Nick, Sis. That I'm not just some kid anymore, and that I'm not useless."

"I don't think Phoenix thinks you're useless."

"But," Maya continues, like her sister hasn't spoken, her words slurring as she feels herself becoming drowsy with sleep, "I think that right now, out of everything, I want to see him." ( _I want_ him _.)_

Maya falls asleep to Mia's voice, soft and wise as ever, "It's okay to _want._ "

And it's a simple answer to all her problems, and so unapologetically _Mia_ that Maya realizes she misses her sister a lot more than she thought. (If only you were here, Sis – _really_ here.)

She wants so much, but then she thinks of her village and the Elders who try to find everything wrong in her, and Maya forces the thoughts away. She has to fulfill her responsibilities here, first. Maya keeps telling herself that it'll be worth it – to go back to the office, to see him again – and she hopes it's not a lie.

That night, she dreams of burger joints and ladders, and the Steel Samurai reruns every weekday morning. She dreams of crime scene investigations and the warm hugs they share after they win a case. She dreams of piggyback rides from the bus station back to the office. She dreams of him saving her, over and over and over, and the blush on Phoenix's face when Pearl calls him Maya's "special someone."

Mostly, she dreams of him.

—

She learns about it from a newspaper, late in the afternoon. Kurain may be an isolated village in the mountains, but Maya's made sure to always have a copy sent up to her chambers so that she wasn't completely separated from the city.

 _Phoenix Wright, Acclaimed Turnabout Terror, Found Using Forged Evidence_

The headline makes her heart drop, and her stomach churns.

There had to be some sort of mistake.

She slips out of the Fey Manor, clutching the newspaper close with a death grip, afraid of the contents being leaked to any of the villagers. They didn't need to know.

Maya heads towards the quaint bus station by the entrance of the village, making careful to avoid any wandering gazes. Sneaking out has always been one of her better skills.

Phoenix ignores all her calls. It's not like him. She bounces up and down impatiently in the phone booth, biting down on her lip as the next one goes straight to voicemail again. Maya's sure the bus is scheduled to come any minute now, but she inserts another coin into the machine and tries again.

All she hears is ringing. She's never hated a sound more.

And when she boards the bus to the train station, she doesn't think of the lectures and the punishments she'll receive for leaving the village without notifying anyone. There is only one thing on Maya's mind.

Phoenix has always been the more important priority to her.

—

Standing in front of the Wright & Co. Law Offices has never felt so daunting before. Or, maybe there _was_ a time when she visited the office for the first time after her sister's death, but that was so long ago, and she hasn't felt that way since. The chills continue to crawl up her spine, leading her to shiver.

Maya shakes off the unsettling nerves, opting not to knock – if Phoenix isn't answering his phone, then he's in no mood to answer the door. She'll just have to force the meeting.

Maya shuffles through her pockets for her key to the office, her hand shaking when she unlocks the door.

When she enters, the first thing she notices is that the lights are off. The next is him, in his button-up and blue slacks, sitting under the window sill with his knees drawn to his chest. His head is down, covered by his crossed arms atop his knees. To her, he's always looked like some strong hero that could rival even the Steel Samurai, but right now, he looks so small.

"Nick…" Maya breathes out, and it's so faint that she doesn't know if she even said it.

He barely registers her presence.

Maya's eyes dart to the blue coat thrown haphazardly onto the back of the leather couch. She rushes over to it, tossing it over in her hands, looking for something.

It's not there. His badge isn't there.

Maya feels sick to her stomach.

"Is it true?"

This garners a response from Phoenix. He sighs.

"Not the forging, you idiot. I _know_ you, and that means you didn't do it." Everything comes out of her mouth is harsher than it is reassuring, and she winces at the noise she makes. Maya holds up the coat, inching closer to him. "I… I'm talking about your _badge_. Is it really…?"

"Yes. It's gone." It's harder to take in when he's the one saying it. Phoenix's head is back up, though he continues to slouch against the wall. His voice is rough and laced with self-deprecation when he mutters under his breath, "…Like I deserved it anyway."

"Nick… don't say that," she chides, softly, before settling down onto the floor next to him. For the first time since they've met, Maya makes sure to keep a small distance between them. His head is turned away from her, and she places a delicate hand on his shoulder. "What… can you tell me what happened? I read the news, it just doesn't make any sense—"

"Then it's exactly how they said. I presented forged evidence in court, and then I got my badge taken away. There's nothing else to it."

"We both know that's not true."

Phoenix sighs again, relenting.

And then he tells her.

He tells her about his client, about how he became his lawyer after winning a poker game. He tells her about the trial, how he took the diary page from the little girl – his client's daughter – and how the prosecution egged him on and how he took every single piece of bait there was. How his client disappeared in the aftermath. He tried his best to argue his case during the Bar Association review, but it was no use – "Who would want to listen to someone with an almost perfect win streak try to explain forged evidence?" Phoenix scoffs.

Maya's at a loss.

They make eye contact for the first time that night. Phoenix's eyes used to be a piercing brown, but now they're dulled over, and the fire doesn't quite reach them anymore. She wonders if it's selfish that a part of her wants to tell him that she _loves_ him.

That there's nothing else she wants more desperately than to stay right here by his side until things get better like he would for her.

And then she thinks of his situation, her situation, and of the Elders, and the thought leaves just as soon as it comes.

So, Maya chokes down her words and instead asks, "Is there anything I can do for you, Nick?"

He smiles, in a sad looking way Maya has never seen before, "You're important to me, you know that, right Maya?" And she nods, and he grabs her hand and her heart races, and _she just might combust and—_ "…Let's not talk anymore."

There's a short pause, but Maya feels like it's been an hour and the air is thick. She doesn't know if she can breathe properly.

"…Huh?"

"It's not safe," he's quick to explain himself, avoiding her eyes now. "I have an idea about what happened, but… it's dangerous. Digging around is going to be dangerous. I don't want anything to happen to you, no… I _won't_ let anything happen to you."

"I can help, too, you know." Maya is stubborn and fired up, angry at the idea that Phoenix is pushing her away when she knows he needs her the most. "I'm not _entirely_ useless!"

His voice is quiet when he says, "Please, Maya. Just until I figure things out, until I have everything settled. I have a feeling that—" He licks his lips, twice, running a hand through his hair, "—this is something I have to do on my own."

Maya doesn't think Phoenix has ever pleaded with her before.

And she feels her edges soften, her heart still beating just as fast as it drops into the pit of her stomach. Maya swallows, closing her eyes. When she opens them again, the smile she plasters onto her face feels heavy.

 _Don't do this, Nick,_ is what she wants to say. _If you leave me too, what else do I have left?_

"Okay," is what she says instead. "You know where to find me, Nick."

The small smile that he gives her somehow manages to make her feel even worse than before.

Phoenix is being selfish, and she lets him. Maya wonders if she'll let herself be selfish sometimes, too.

"I'm staying the night, though." Maya finds the courage to continue talking, eyes trained on Charley. Maybe if she doesn't look at him, she won't have to cry. "I took the last train down."

"…That's fine with me. Thank you for checking up on me, Maya."

She doesn't have the energy to move, so they sit there under the window, in a silence that is too heavy and too uncomfortable. The soft hues of the moon and the neon lights of the faulty Gatewater Hotel sign are the only sources of light in the office, and Maya watches as they blink on and off.

They met here, once, under the worse of circumstances. She thinks it's ironic that they're parting here, in a different kind of sadness.

Maya doesn't get much sleep, and she knows that Phoenix doesn't either.

(She wakes up before the sun rises with a crick in her neck, a blanket over her body, and a couple of bills sitting in the spot Phoenix occupied, presumably for the train ticket and bus fare. There's a bitter taste in her mouth, realizing that even after everything, Phoenix cares for her more than he does himself.)

—

Life continues, and Maya thinks it's a strange concept. After all, how could the world keep spinning when she's at her most unbalanced?

But it _does_.

Just like how life went on after Misty left, after Mia died… then it'll keep going when Phoenix leaves her behind.

Life is like that, sometimes.

Maya remembers a time when she used to be the one who knew Phoenix the best, but now all she knows about him are small tidbits of information she can get her hands on from Miles Edgeworth. (He doesn't know much either, and Phoenix becomes the enigma she never imagined he could be.)

Phoenix is working part-time at some Russian-themed club, sometimes as a pianist and other times as a poker player. She doesn't really understand it much.

In hindsight, maybe she never will.

Instead, she pours her all into two different things.

One is Kurain; her training.

Her ability to channel spirits is becoming more controlled, and sometimes she can even will them out of her body without a Magatama of Parting. Waterfalls don't bruise as much as they used to, and the old writing in scrolls is less difficult to navigate. The Elders start to trust her capability, albeit begrudgingly, and her road to becoming Master is less of a trudge and more of a steady hike.

The other is handwritten notes; her heart.

Maya has Pearl order Steel Samurai DVDs for her while she's stuck in the village, from quaint family-owned video stores to online in city libraries for the box sets of rare spinoffs. They pile up in the corner of her room, and soon enough, they form a large stack across her wall. Perhaps it's a silly way to cope with things, but one by one, she sends them off to the Wright and Co. Law Offices.

And, one by one, she fills them with writing.

Her notes are scrawled across napkins and crumpled papers, the backs of old receipts and postcards. It is purple and loopy and vulnerable. It's more for her than it is for him. If he never really wanted to watch her favorite show when she was around, who's to say that he'll be more inclined when she isn't?

She could keep a diary, but there's something reassuring about sending her thoughts off, with no return address to keep her tied to them. If they make it to him – ( _does he still even live there?)_ – then he'll know without needing one. Besides, what was the point of laying low if she were to post her address so openly on a package?

In the original Steel Samurai season 1 DVD, Maya asks him to think of her when he writes up episode reports so that she knows he's watching. Season 6 has "I believe in you, Nick. You'll get through this, like you always do." And in one of the more obscure spinoffs, she writes, "Nick. I miss you."

Most of the time, however, she writes about her day. Short updates about her training, how Pearl was doing. Her feelings on missing a lot of the newer episodes of the Steel Samurai, and how she wishes she could convince the Elders to put a TV in the Master's chambers, but it'd involve installing whole signal towers and too much work at the end of the day.

But today's note is written in the early hours of the morning after Maya tosses and turns in bed; when sleep never finds her.

 _It's weird, Nick,_ she writes. _Growing up without you by my side. Even though you kept telling me you believed in me, and that I could do anything I set my mind to… I just never thought I'd be celebrating these milestones without you. And if I could be honest, I'm still trying to be okay with everything. I think I will be, eventually._

With the strength she's always had, she slips the scrap of paper into the DVD casing and closes it shut. At this point, Maya just needs to keep moving forward.

—

"This isn't healthy, you know."

"What isn't?" Maya feigns ignorance, going as far as to start humming the Steel Samurai theme song as she organizes her study materials at her desk. The History of Khura'in goes there, followed by the Chronicles of Ami Fey, and there goes the detailed rulebook for the Kurain Channeling Technique-

"This." Mia takes a scroll out of her hand, looking Maya in the eye. "Pretending to be okay about everything. You're upset. How long has it been since Phoenix has talked to you?"

"…Three years, now? Maybe almost four?" Maya's lost count. She's been trying too hard to forget that a part of her is scared that it's _actually_ working.

"Maya…"

Maya sighs and lays her head down on her desk. Her cheek is pressed against the cool surface, and her voice is slightly muffled when she says, "Sis… weren't you the one with that quote, the one about how the only time a lawyer can cry is when it's all over?"

Mia leans on the desk, laying a hand on Maya's shoulder and giving a reassuring squeeze.

"Well, first off, you're not a lawyer. You're my little sister. Second, I think that you can afford some tears every now and then."

The tears fall.

First, it's one, then two, and then they start pooling on the wooden surface. She angrily rubs at her eyes with the sleeve of her robe, like the tears were taboo to her, and then she hiccups, and they don't stop falling.

Maya breaks down.

"I hate waiting. I hate waiting and not knowing if something's going to happen in the end. I don't even know if he's making any progress in his investigation. I hate not being helpful. I'm not even _Master_ yet, so I don't have the political prowess or even the _title_ , so it's not like I can do anything for him _but_ wait _._ But I hated waiting when mom left, and everyone told me she was coming back even though she never did, not really, and I hate waiting now.

"And I know it's stupid of me to feel this way because I _know_ him." At least, Maya thinks to herself, she knows who he used to be. She admits out loud, a secret she's been keeping to herself all these years, "I loved him, I think. I still do. I know that this is hard for him, that he didn't really want this. He was in the wrong courtroom with the wrong client at the wrong time. And now he has to pick up the pieces… _alone_. He's hurting, Sis."

"You're hurting, too," Mia says, a small frown on her face.

With a shallow nod, Maya cries for herself.

This time, she falls asleep with Mia rubbing her back as she sobs into her pillow, and to the sound of Phoenix's voice, warm and comforting, echoing in her mind, _"I'll be right by your side through it all."_

She dreams of staying in contact with him, of meetings in that shady poker club she's heard all about. She dreams of late-night rendezvous, of sneaking out of Kurain and into the office to see him again. She dreams of meeting his adopted daughter, finally, and sitting on the piano bench by his side while he plays her a tune. She dreams of People Park at midnight, dressed in his oversized Ivy U sweater she loves so much and sharing the first kiss she always imagined they would have.

She dreams of a normal kind of love – as normal a love between Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey could get.

—

Maya never does stop thinking of him, and a part of her wonders how long that small string of hope can support her.

She thinks of him as she sees men come and go in the village, some even taking an interest in courting her, but all she does in return is a polite refusal. She thinks of him even when Pearl stops making referring to him as her 'special someone', and eventually stops asking about him. She thinks of him even when she runs out of DVDs to send, and her disjointed thoughts pile up without a destination.

But Maya is just as stubborn as she is loyal, and she focuses on her training, finding herself stuck in a constant loop of waiting.

And then she gets a letter.

 _Mystic Maya,_

 _I know that you're busy, but there's something I think you'd like to see._

 _Lots of love,_

 _Pearl_

Beneath the small note with the cursive pink handwriting is a newspaper, dated October 9th, 2026.

—

Platform five, platform five, platform five.

Apparently, when Pearl saw the news, she was so ecstatic that she set everything up. Maya isn't so sure she's ready for this.

But she was whisked onto the first train that morning by an overly giddy cousin, and in the blink of an eye, she finds herself back in the city.

Platform… five.

And there he is.

He's aged, which is a given, but Maya's in awe with how much he looks the same. He's dressed in one of his old white button-ups (she remembers because the button on his cuffs is missing, and he has to roll up his sleeves to hide the fact that he's never gotten it fixed) with a pair of sweats he usually wears to bed. With his five o'clock shadow and the way that his spikes droop because of how long his hair has gotten, he looks so ridiculous, and Maya wonders why exactly she thinks that he still looks so good.

She sets her things down onto the ground beside a jumpy Pearl, who is waving wholeheartedly at Phoenix. She feels herself running before she can even process it.

" _NIIII—"_ Her arms are wrapped around his neck, now, and there's a breathy chuckle in her ear when he picks her up and twirls her around. _"—ICK!"_

"Maya… I'm so glad you're here." And then in a smaller voice, he admits, "I've missed you, a lot."

Phoenix sets her down, but his arms stay wrapped around her torso.

And Maya swore to herself that she'd punch him in the arm or tell him that he'll have to try even harder if he wanted her trust back, but when she sees the red tinging his cheeks, she can't find it in herself to be mad right now.

Because this is _Nick_ – her Nick. This is the Phoenix she's longed for all these years, and he's finally in front of her.

In the distance, she can see Pearl talking to someone a little taller than her, dressed in shades of blue and sparkly gems. _(Is that his daughter…?)_

Phoenix starts talking again, and her attention snaps back over to him. His voice is sheepish and apologetic when he says, "I, uh. I'm sorry, Maya. For making you wait for so long… for everything, really. It was dumb, huh? To be honest, there was a big part of me that regretted it the moment I brought it up."

"Yeah. Super dumb," Maya agrees wholeheartedly, and she feels like the empty feeling that's been plaguing her for years is filling up fast – she has always been so easy to please. "And you owe me _so_ much for everything. I'm thinking the saltiest bowl of noodles you can get from Eldoon's!"

And he laughs, and she laughs, and she swears this is the lightest her heart has felt in years.

Softly, Maya adds, biting on the inside of her cheek as her giggling subsides, "But… everything's fine now, right?"

His eyes are bright again. She can see the fire, this time.

"Yeah. Everything's fine," Phoenix echoes, the corners of his lips tugging upwards into a smile. "It's all over. That's all that matters."

Maya holds him tight enough to make sure he never leaves her again.

She's just as in love as she was back when she was his assistant, and he was an attorney. Except, there's nothing stopping her now.

Mia's words act like a mantra in the back of her head. _It's okay to want, it's okay to want, it's okay to_ want.

There's a lot of things she wants and has been _wanting_. And a lot of it is about him.

If he could be selfish for seven years – she can be selfish now, too.

Maya grabs him by the collar of his shirt and kisses him full on the mouth. There's a moment that her heart stops beating because Phoenix is frozen, and she squeezes her eyes closed, too scared to see the look of disgust on his face. And then he kisses back. The arm that has never left her waist tightens around her, pulling her in closer, almost desperately.

She makes a satisfied sound, and everything is exactly what she wanted.

And then Maya wakes up in the Kingdom of Khura'in, halfway across the globe from small village Kurain; halfway across the globe from a tiny law office in the middle of Los Angeles.

She's wrapped with a borrowed blanket from Tahrust Inmee, the high priest in this country that has taken her in like a daughter. Maya's here to complete the last part of her training by observing the techniques used at the motherland of the Kurain Channeling Technique, and she's been doing so for a few months.

She's twenty-six now, and in two years, she's due to return to Kurain to finally inherit the title of Master.

Maya looks to her side at the slightly crinkled newspaper she received in the mail the day before, the large print with bold lettering – _"Phoenix Wright: No Longer the Forgin' Attorney?_ " – and she lets out a sigh of relief. _(At least_ something _was real.)_

Lately, she's been dreaming about reunions. Sometimes, it's at the train station. Other times, it's at the airport, sending her off until they meet again. Reunions where they meet coincidentally on the street after so long, reunions where he shows up at Kurain and reunions where she finds herself standing in front of the office. The rotten-to-the-tooth kind of happy, heart-jumping-out-of-chest, otherworldly feeling type of reunion. The "too good to be true" reunion, the "doesn't exist" reunion.

Her finger traces the outline of his face on the paper. She hasn't seen him in a long time.

However, with this news… maybe her dream isn't too far off from reality.

After all this time, she thinks she's ready to try again – to _start_ again. It'll be different and awkward, and she'll have to give herself some time to forgive and trust again, but Maya _knows_ the kind of relationship they have. In time, they'll be able to pick up right where they left off.

She wrestles her cell phone out of the folds of her blanket and punches in a number she's long since memorized. Her finger plays with the pink strap of her phone as her call goes through.

It rings, and rings, and rings.

And then, it stops. He answers.

She takes in a deep breath. "Hey, Nick."

—

 **Note:** I feel like I can best explain this fic as Maya being my absolute favorite character, so obviously writing her suffering was number one on my list – which resulted in the _most_ self-indulgent fic I've ever written before. I hope y'all enjoyed this read!


End file.
